A few Fridays ago I met friends at an event early in the evening, joined another group of friends for dinner at Sea Level uptown (we killed a few bottles of bubbly and several dozens of oysters between us), and then found myself at Workman's Friend in Plaza Midwood shamelessly ordering coffee at 10pm. The beans were Pure Intentions and oh so delicious.
I struck up a conversation with a friend who I have not seen in a while and asked her how she was was doing. She said she was tired. No, exhausted. She quickly back tracked and said that there's no way she could be more tired than me, a new mom.
There was a time in my corporate job when I was over worked and under paid. There were times when I would work 70-80 hours a week and did not remember how I got home. They say driving exhausted is just as bad as driving drunk. I believe it because I experienced it. One evening, I projected my frustration on Facebook with a fairly innocent post saying that I would love to hire an assistant. I received one response telling me I have no reason to ask for help and to have a kid to understand real exhaustion. Wow. I got shamed.
I burned out at 27.
I told my friend that it's nonsense that she could be less tired than me! I've been in her shoes and was definitely more tired then than I am now with an 11 month old baby. She has a lot on her plate and wants to be successful. We all do. We all have different journeys and goals and there should be no reason why we should shame someone for feeling the way they do because their path is different from ours.